We are both still alive and still talking to each other.

We made it on our drive. We went in  the McDonalds drive-thru and then to Target. She did great! Just got really close to the passenger side curb and parked cars. We will try again after school tomorrow.

First time driving with mom

Driving Miss Kari

It's been a long time for her to wait but my daughter got her driving permit. She had her first behind the wheel yesterday and she is anxiously looking forward to coming home from school and driving with me. I am a bit scared. It feels weird that I don't have a foot myself, like I can do anything from the passenger seat anyway. So how far do I let her drive? No freeways for me yet. And no driving at night. Oh gosh. Only 2 hours till she gets home. Maybe I should medicate myself before we go???

She doesn't look like a bad driver.. right?

another trip to urgent care

Ben was playing with his brother and collided. The results were a busted lip and lots of bleeding. His mouth was bleeding and his nose was bleeding. Since Ben can't talk to tell me if he has more pain we always side with caution and I took him to the urgent care to get checked out. He was a mess and cried for a long time. The doctor checked him out and since they can't sew the inside of his lip there was not much to do for him. This morning he has a huge fat lip and a swollen nose. It looks a little crooked to me but we will wait until the swelling goes down. Poor little guy.  I love that kid!

Did they get the PICC line to work??

A few people have asked me if I finally got the PICC line to work or if the have to replace it. So here is the end of the story.
The doctor had cleared me to go home. My white blood counts had reached an acceptable level so I could go. After 2 doses of de-clotting medicine and 2 hours of trying and failing at getting the blood return, my nurse said,  "This is our last try and you will have to discuss with your doctor tomorrow if he wants you to pull the line and have another on placed." She attached the empty syringe and pulled it back. Nothing. She tried a few times. Nothing. So she left it attached while she went to inform the doctor. My mom was there to drive me home and I told her, "No way am I getting another line placed." So I proceeded to pull back the syringe myself to get a blood return. My mom said "Don't do that. She is going to catch you and you are going to get in trouble." I continued determined to get it to work. And then I screamed, "It worked!!!! I see blood!!" I buzzed the nurse and excitedly told her. She said "You rock! Now let's get you out of here." When she came in the room I told her that she couldn't bust me because she was the one who left the syringe attached so we would go down together for this. We were both happy and I was discharged to go home. Today the line worked perfectly. Small miracles are the best!

I need Marge

Marge is a nurse specializing in PICC lines. She works in the outpatient center but sometimes comes to the chemo suite. She can do it all. When I first met her was the day I got my PICC line placed in. I had spent 4 hours at the hospital for a 30 min procedure. This is when I passed out during the procedure and they had to start all over. It was just a mess. Well in the afternoon I met with my oncologist and told him my heart was fluttering. He ordered to have the line pulled back a bit. That is when I met Marge. She scared me. Kinda tough looking and stern. She looked at my x rays and said it looked just perfect but would do what the doctor ordered.  She scared me that day but I got the line repositioned and felt much better. I saw her again during last chemo round. My line was tough to get fluids to flush through so the nurse said, "I'm going to call Marge to come down and help." "No!" I protested. Surprisingly the nurse said "Why?" Well I couldn't say 'oh that is because she scares the crap out of me.' So I just said "Oh, I'm just nervous". Well Marge came down and worked her magic and my problems were solved. Now, I'm starting to like Marge a bit more. Maybe I just need to peel back her tough layers. Last week when I had a bandage change (every week I have to have the bandage changed around my PICC line), it was Marge who changed it. I asked her how she got interested in specializing in PICC lines because it is the last thing I would want to to. I'm a bit phobic about IV lines and stuff. She told me they were going to teach nurses to place the PICC lines and she was the only woman nurse to volunteer to learn. That is because they were practicing on the inmates and the men's prison. Oh my gosh! She spoke with love and concern for these inmates. And then I started to love Marge! She is tough! but she loves her job and works hard at it. This weekend at the hospital they couldn't get my PICC line to work. After hours of trying to de-clot it they were about to pull the line out and start a new one. All I could think was.. I NEED MARGE!!! I love her.

Are you going to read me my Miranda Rights too??

During the 3rd day of my hospital stay, a random nurse came in my room rather abruptly and started typing on the computer, She says to me that she just noticed that I was listed as a "Risk for Falling". She came over to my bed and said, " I have to set the alarm. If you need to get out of bed then call for a nurse." And then she started to leave. Are you joking me?? An alarm on my bed to keep me in it? "Wait"! I told her that I had been getting out of bed to use the bathroom for 3 days using a walker and no one had a problem before that. She said, "Have you ever fallen?" I replied no. She said " Have you fallen since you had your amputation. I told her only once, the first day. That was 3 months ago. She said, "Then you have a risk for falling." She told me that it was policy and she was sorry but she had to do it. I then told her that it would be a big hassle because with all the fluids they were giving me that I was in the bathroom alot. Oh and I have to dangle my feet off the side of the bed to get circulation to my legs so I would call her for that too. By the way, who is she anyway? I had never seen that nurse before. But for a brief moment, the thought of being locked in a bed was just too much. I told her that I would apologize now at how much I was going to be calling the nurse button for help. It worked! She finally gave in and said she would remove the "Risk" warning in the computer and took my alarm off my bed. I won over my freedom. At least in my little space.

Happy New Year from the hospital

I rang in the New Year from my hospital bed. It wasn't so bad really. At least that is what I told myself. All week I have felt like I had gotten sick on top of my chemo side effects. Plus a couple of the kids had sore throats and coughs. Well on Thursday my sore throat and cough were finally better and I thought I had beat it but I got the chills and the fever. After two call to the oncologist to verify that I really did have to go to the ER, we stopped by the urgent clinic to see if they could give me the IV antibiotics I was going to need or if we had to go to the germ infested ER. They ran by blood work and my white blood count was 0.6. Which means I basically had none. They immediately started me on 3 antibiotics and called an ambulance to drive me to the hospital. The hospital we use is downtown, about 45 min. Fun times. We didn't go with sirens, I just needed to be under medical care since I was already hooked up to the IV. The good news is that the oncology floor is all private rooms because of the germ passing factor. The nurses and all who enter my room wear masks. My door stayed shut for the 4 days I was there. I felt like I was in isolation. Oh wait... I was. I watched so much tv that my brain might pop. We don't have cable at our house so some of these shows were new to me. The highlights were...The Back to the Future trilogy, The Deadliest Catch, Ghost Hunters, Sister Wives (I watched 6 episodes), Say Yes to the Dress, and even Native fish of Thailand. I watched the ball drop on New Years Eve and the first person I wished a happy new year to was my night nurse, who was an older man nurse- awkward.