The "Bonus Trials"

I was going through a photo album on my computer and found some pictures from my chemo days. It feels like so long ago. And other than a prosthetic leg, I don't have any visual effects left on my body. My hair has grown in past my shoulders, my eyelashes are thick and long again and my skin tone has evened out. I don't have a PICC line to deal with and only a tiny scar to show for that. I don't have to get weekly blood tests and overall, it seems like it was ages ago. But when I carried my son into the operating room and waited with him for the anesthesia to take effect, I took a quick look around and was flooded with all the intense feelings I felt as I had been in a room similar to it having my leg sawed off. It has stuck with me this week. Although I have been focused on my son's recovery, I have had some grieving feelings of my own over losing my leg. I honestly miss my leg. Not the cancer and contaminated leg. That was a blessing to get rid of. But just an average standard leg.
So now I want to put up some pictures just for my own reminicing.


So the hospital was about a 45 min drive to get to and since we didn't want to be late we arrived way to early. There was a Costco across the street so we browsed around and looked for some good books we could read for the week in the hospital and got Kenneth something to eat before the long night of waiting through surgery. (It was a 6:30pm scheduled surgery).
Now I had to be fasting all day and was a bit tempted my the yummy Costco style hot dog. But did my supportive husband really need to include the giant soft serve icecream delight?

 

 

 

Then this next picture is me.. Patiently waiting for him to finish his feast as I have tired, stressed out eyes from my occasional crying and nervous mood. Oh and did I mention I had been FASTING until the above time of 6pm????

 

Wow. I look really bad. But this is what it looks like an hour before your leg is amputated!!

 

 

 

 

Then I found these cool pictures of my RAW leg after taking the first casting off.

 

WARNING!!!.... the following pictures are Gross!!!

 

 

 

Prying the cast off.

 

 

 

2 weeks after amputation. First look at new leg.

 

 

 

 

And this next picture is pretty gross. This is the wound that opened up and had to be packed with gauze everyday for 4 months until it filled itself in with scar tissue. But it is probably one of my favorite pictures of the journey. It just proves again to me that my life has never been easy. Even when I have hard trials I usually get the 'extra bonus' trial to go along with it.

 



 

Yeah. That is still gross to look at. But, I'm still pretty proud of that extra trial.